Feb. 28, 2011 Srinking Tumor, Laughing Hawk

Woo Nellie!  Hair every where.  I look like a dog with the itch( that's "each" to you folks back  home).  There is an old warner Bro. cartoon of a witch that when she moves, hair pins fly off.  Well, when I move hair flys off.  I had no idea I had so much hair.  It has fallen out for 3 days and I still have enough to see.  Not for long. 
Had a good day Saturday and a poor day yesterday.  So far today, I feel fair.  Have to go for radiation a today so it will get me out of the house.  I did get to Sunday School and Church yesterday. 
I seem to have a lot of pain in my throat and makes it hard to eat anything tha is not soft.  Some days are worse than others.  This morning wasn't so bad. I think I have not gained back the 10 or 11 pounds I lost so I have got to keep eating and the throat thing makes it more difficult.
Thunder and lightning here this morning and looks like I'll have to take out right in the midddle of it.  Mark Murphy is taking me this morning. 

Feb.26, 2011 Srinking tumor, Laughing Hawk

Boy does this thing change from hour to hour. One minute I'm ok and the next I feel like the world is closing in.  One must meditate on the Laughing Hawk consistently to get through it.  Yesterday I felt fine physically but the chemical change from not taking steroids and chemo just had my head in a terrible state.  Slept without aid last night for a few hours.  Sleep is still shallow and I dream most of the night. Right now fatigue is the biggest problem plus my lower throat and esophagus are very sore which makes it hard to swallow.

Going to try to get through the day without crashing today and hope that tomorrow brings better times.  Thank you Lord for this day and your help.

Hair started to go this morning. I'm looking for a good hat to help me through that.

Feb. 25,2011

Te srinking tumor fought back late yesterrday and last night.  Lots of lower back bain and sleeplessness.  Don't know why my lower back started hurting.  That is close to nothing that we are fighting.  Seems like enimies find your weak spot no matter where it is.  At any rate had a fairly rough night but did manage to sleep some.  My radiation treatment yesterday was later than usual because one of their machines was broken and all patients had to share the same one.  It was fine.  Upset the tech more than it did me.  Brother Dave Evans took me and I thank him for giving up his afternoon. Kevin Tudor is on duty today and I am so greatful for these people.

Talked to much family from WV yesterday and We hear Emma loved "River Dance" night before last.  Good ole Irish girl that she is. Talked with cuzz Doug at length and things in Corton seem to be as usual,(that would be pretty dead).  That ws a good place to grow up but wouldn't want to live there.

I go back this morning and I hope the machine is fixed.  I also hope I get some strength back and that my back stops hurting.  Pray that we have a good weekend.  At least I have a 2 day break from Lexington.
I pray that the Lord blesses each and everyone and their house.

Feb. 24, 2011 Srinking Tumor, Laughing Hawk

Today we change the theme a little bit.  I woke up this morning feeling a little better and hungry.  I think we will go to Japanese film mode on this thing.  We'll gonna call it "Shrinking Tumor, Laughing Hawk".  So from now on the enemey is the srinking tumor and the victor is the laughin Hawk.( You know who the Hawk Is).

Had radiation yesterday and it went well.  Doctor check up was uneventful as I have not been through enough torture to tell anyting yet.(They keep thinking I will talk but I'll never give in.)  I go back later today for the treatment because something happened to their radiation machine( I broke it) and can't get it fixed by this morning.  I go at 1:30. 

I did get to church last night and that was a good thing.  I am gettting help from a lot of people and I thank all of them.  Thanks for all the things.  Rose Ginter, I don't know you other than through Charlie but I know that you are a friend of mine. Thank you.  Thanks to Clint and Mary  and david Gilllispie for your help. And thanks to brothers Mack and Ted for checking on me.  My kids have helped in so many ways and I thank them.

I hope this Movie wins aa Oscar."Srinking Tumor, Laughing Hawl.  Staring Yours Truly And The Lord.

Feb. 22, 2011

I'm late in getting to this today.  I have had a couple of hard days but I still have do pretty well considering all the junk I have in my body now.  Chemo is over for a while but the effects linger on.  Still hard to eat and not feel sick but that is what I have to do.  I have to eat and keep my strength up.  Today was better than yesterday and I hope tomorrow will be better than today.  I have one more day to take steroids and I hope I feel better when I'm off those things.  I have a feeling that I will.
I go for my8th radiation treatment tomorrow and I will also see my radiation doctor.  Not much to tell by then but he may have some insight into how I feel and why.  Looking in the mirror today I looked 10 years older than last week. Scared me and I ain't afraid of much. 

Feb. 21, 2011

Very bad day yesterday followed by very bad night.  The sickness is powerful.  I try to stay above it but it is hard.  Went for radiation treatment this morning and made it through ok.  The ride to and from is the hard part.  I hope it settles down today and I can get back to some normal feelings.  So far I have not had much of a day.

Tammy is with me today and that is always better to be with her.  She is such a great help in all ways.  I think I will go take a rest and maybe try to catch up on the writing later.

Sunday Feb 20, 2011

Yesterday was a fairly good day until the night came on.  The steroids I'm taking make the nights long and tense.  I can't sleep but I don't hurt so I just have to lay there and think.  Too much thinking can get you into trouble so I try not to think.  I usually settle down about 4:00am and then I'm up at 5:30 or 6:00 ready to go
.
The week end as been a good one.  Tammy and I went out for two outings so I could get some exercise while the weather is good.   Can't do too much but it makes me feel better to go and do something for a little while rather than sit and do nothing.  Dr. Mc Garry said it was best not to sit down and to eat as much as I can.  I do both and both do help me feel better.  Good friends calling and stopping by are a great help.  Brother Mack calls often and that keeps the family connection going.  Ted checks in every now and then also. 

I'm getting ready to go to Church and that has its fear factor.  Now is the time that I can catch stuff as my system goes down so I have to watch hugs and hand shakes and little kids especially. 

O yeah,  My furnace quit working this morning.  What's up with that.  Hope we can find someone to fix it on Sunday.  It will get cold in here tonight. 

Just radiation tomorrrow and Tammy is taking me; should be in and out on 20 min. 
Thanks to everyone for the help and God bless you all and your house.
Roger

Day 9

I'm a little late in posting today.  The last chemo treatment in this series is a killer.  I spent all day (6+hrs.) in the seat today.  When I got home it felt like I had been run over by truck.  Daughter Emily accompanied me to and from and spent the day watching me get the junk dripping into my system. My kids sure are a help in this. All in all I have come through this first round without too much discomfort.
 As I go into and out of the center each day I am amazed by how many people are going through this regimen each day with me.  It's a steady stream of patients and there seems to be no end.  You never notice anything as much as when you are a part of it. 
The best of the day was during the middle of the treatment.  I looked out the window and pointed out to Emily that up there was my hawk.  He flew in over the area circled above my window and sailed off, as if to say.  "I will never forsake you."

Day 7

Today has been a fair day.  Had my radiation at 9:00 am and was back home by 10:00 am.  Took the MG Midget for a ride and enjoyed the spring-like day.  I feel fairly good today as I have not had chemo for two days.  Last night was a little rough with pain and not much sleep but all and all I think I had a pretty good 24 hours.  Tomorrow is a six hour session with chemo preceded by radiation.  That should be my last chemo for 28 days.  It will also be a hard one because of the length of infusion.  They say that 14 days from tomorrow will be my worst time as far as recovery from chemo.  I pray that it will be easier than I think and that the good Lord will spare me the worst.  I think He will. 
Hope to continue this each day so you can keep tabs on me.  It is good for me also and I will try my best to keep up.

Update Day 5

This is the first day of my blog.  I have decided to update friends and foes alike about my cancer treatment as the days go by.  Yesterday( the fourt day of treatment) was by far the worst yet.  I suppose it will only get worse from here on until I get through this.  With God's help and good friends to pray and help, I will get through this.  I go for my 5th chemo treatment and 2nd radiation treatment today.  Daughter Meg will go with me today.  My kids are all saints through all this.  They have all helped so much.  My wife Tammy is the one I lean on most.  Of course I have been leaning on her for 30 years now.  She has been and continues to be my rock..

I'll try to give updates as I can on this blogg but I never know how I am going to feel.  I could not have done it yesterday.  Today I awoke with the words to an old hymn "Hallelujah, thine the glory, Halleujah, amen.  Hallelujah thine the glory. Revive us again."  Sing that with me today.