Monday, October 24, 2011

Six Month Progress report.

I got great news from the doctors today.  They say I am in full remission and won't have to see them until January.  This time last year I didn't know I had a problem and now it looks as if I won the first battle.  Dr. McGary said I responded to treatment much better than most.  Dr. Arnold said my faith had made me well. Both agreed that I had done better than the majority of lung cancer patients. 

I feel like I should do something special for all those who prayed and supported me through the darkness of chemo and radiation treatments.  I just wish I knew what I could do. I will pray for and ask a blessing for you all and I know God will answer my prayer. See you in a while.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

The Hawk Soars High

I have news from the doctor today and he tells me that the cancer is virtually gone.  My last PET scan is in and the results are that I am showing no cancer in any of the lymph nodes or trachea.  My main tumor has shrunk to nothing but a scar and I am feeling good. 
It has been a while since I have written anything on this blog and it is because I have had nothing to report. It has been a nail biting, waiting game to see how the radiation and chemo worked.  It worked good but I think it had a lot of help.  The first Sunday in July, during communion, I had this nudge that told me I was healed.  I believed it and kept telling myself not to doubt.  Well, the doctor confirmed it today and I give the credit to God for doing it through the doctors and trough the prayers of the many.
Let me end by saying I really appreciate your prayers and your kind words of encouragement.  god bless you and your house.

Monday, June 20, 2011

June 20,2011

It has been a long time since I reported on this blog.  Truth is that I have not had much to report.  The time after treatment until now has been a waiting period or, as we refer to them, the doldrums.  So, here goes.  I got a good report , cancer wise, last week but my oxygen levels were low and I felt lousy.  Today I went back to follow up after  week on prednisone and an antibiotic and everything is back to normal. well, normal as one can be at ths point.  Bottom line is that my tumor has srunk from 8+ cm to 1.8 cm.  that is good news and the fact that I finally feel beter is even better news to me.  We prayed that we would be healed by the hand of God and I think we have achieved much.  I will praise God for this outcome and I want you to praise Him with me.  We are not through with the fight but we are winning at this point and that is enough or me to celebrate. 
I can't thank everyone enough for your love and prayers and I hope you continue to keep me in your prayers.  I must admit that I was in the vally of the shadow of death and I foud that He was always with me.  The Hawk always flew before me laughing and, as I said before, The tumor is srinking.    God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

May 18,2011

I haven't writtten much bucause there has been little to write about.  I am doing well and I am just waiting for the June 10th, scan to see what we do next.  While I wait, I am feeling good enough to resume normal activity and am feeling better each day.  I still have a little burn in my swollowing and my back is still itching like a sun burn.  My feet still have some numbness from the chemo. I don't know if that will ever go away. My hair is not back yet so I have a ways to go.
Please don't stop praying as I need it now as much as ever.  God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

May 11, 2011

I have been thinking about how all my friends and family have been so supportive through all this battle.  I guess there will never be a way to repay any of you but I sure wish there were. It has been an eye( and heart), opener for me. 
I guess until you are in this situation you never stop to think about needing help from friends.  We all assume that we can pretty much handle all that life throws at us.  Then it throws a curve like you have never seen or expected.  It is then you realize that, as John Prine said, " everybody needs sombody that they can talk to"and as  Bob Dylan says " you got to serve sombody; It might be the Devil or it might be the Lord, but you got to serve sombody. Well, I found out both statements are true.
I am trying to say,badly, that we cannot complete this life alone, without help.  We need our friends, family and, most of all, God.  I am talking about the God of Abraham.  I had no idea how much I needed God until this cancer battle.  He does what he says he will do and He made me able to stand all the poison they put into me without much problem.  I was blessed to never get sick through all of this.  I had my battles but the Hawk was always there.  It may have been through a friend stopping by at the right moment, a check arriving in the mail on the right day, a card in the mail from someone giving me encourgement or someone praying for me but when I was down.  He was always there.  I do not ever want to forget that.  All you friends out there: don't ever let me forget it.  If I ever get to acting like I was the one who brought myself through this, smack me up side the head and remind me what I have said here today.

I am having good days now.  I don't know if the battle is over.  I won't know that until the 10th of June when they do my other scan but I do know that, so far, I have been doing good through all of this because of all of you folks out there who have prayed and encourged me through it all. I really thank all of you friends, family and church, for your support.  God bless you and your house

Monday, May 9, 2011

May 9, 2011

It is nice here this morning; clear with a tempeture of 60.  I was able to sleep in two hour blocks last night which is better than I have been doing.  My heart rate is up and it keeps me from sleeping.  I'm going to call someone today to see if we can figure out what is going on.  Other than that, I feel good.  I'm eating good and can do most anything.  I attempted to cut my grass Friday and had to get Tammy to rescue me about 3/4 of the way through.  I'm still a little weak but improving dailey.  The only problem now is the sleep thing and the heart beat of 100+ per min. Who knows.
The last hawk I saw was getting pounded by a crow.  It was last Friday morning when I went out with my dog.  They flew away with the crow attacking the hawk over and over.  I wonder what that could have meant.  Anyway, God bless you and your house.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

May 5, 2011

I had a breathing test today at UK hospital.  It was given to determine if I have lost any breathing capacity and to see how much my lungs are converting the oxygen I take in to usable oxygen in my blood.  Everything came out great. the lady who gave the test said I was "perfect".(I think she just meant on the breathing thing).
That made me feel a lot better.  I even came home and attempted to cut my own grass.  I got most of it cut before I had to get Tammy to rescue me.  I just couldn't quite make it.  It will take more time.
The hawk is soaring high today and the tumor......well, you know how tricky tumors are, but it is shrinking and there ain't nothin' it can do about it.

Monday, May 2, 2011

May 2, 2011

Pet scan shows that cancer is much smaller than before in the left lung.  The spot in my wind pipe is smaller but still showing up and two lymph nodes show about the same as last time.  The oncologist says we are making real progress and the radiologist says we are making progress.  They want to wait another month before making a decision on future treatments.  All in all it is good news for two reasons.  1. I get 5 more weeks of a break and, they tell me, it wll most likly shrink more over the next few weeks.  I am not jumping up and down with the news but I am cautiously optimistic. It sounds like I have a good chance of fighting this thing. 
God bless you and your house.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

April 28, 2011

Going for the PET scan today.  I will not get the results until Monday.  This will make for an interesting weekend;  Waiting to see about the rest of my life.  Whatever the Lord has for me I must face with a smile and praise.  Pray that I can do that.  God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

April 26, 2011

It looks like my scan is scheduled for Thursday April 28, at 12:00 noon.  I will not see the doctor that day but will have to wait until Monday at 12:00 for that.  At least it is not too long of a wait.  Let's all pray for a good report. 
I have felt very good today and have had a fair amount of energy.  The pain is gone and I am not taking  pain medication and haven't for 5 days.  That is really a help to me to not have to take pain meds.  they take away the pain but make me feel bad otherwise.  I am eating good and have very little pain when I swallow. That is also a big step foreward for me.
I hope this is a preview of things to come.  God bless you and your house.

Friday, April 22, 2011

April 22,2011

My insurance company(Humana), has refused to approve my PET scan for Monday.  Therefore, I must wait until we can convience them that this is needed to tell if we have any cancer left in my body.  A pet scan is the only way to be sure what,if anything, is left.  The insurance company knows that and they are just flexing their muscles.  I will be in their face as soon as I can be there and give them what for. In the mean time I will have to wait longer to find out if they whipped this thing or not.  God bless you  and your house.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

April 21, 2011

Another bad day and just when I thought they were behind me.  Had one of those days when all I wanted to do was sleep.  I hurt all over and my eating was way off.  I just lade around all day and slept.  I hope that is a one day thing.  I pray that tomorrow will be better.  God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

April 20,2011

Up at 6:30 today after a good nights sleep.  I went out o take some things to Tammy she had forgotten and to the new Tractor Supply store.  Came home and slept another hour on the couch.  I guess I need it but this sleeping thing is taking too much time.  I am eating better and feeling better except for the tiredness.  I am tired all the time.  Have very little energy to do anything.  As if I could do anything with this constant storming around here.  It is supposed to be better for a few days now.  I hope so. 
Just mainly sitting around here waiting for the pet scan to come, on Monday at 11:30.  Nothing much to add except God bless you and your house.

Monday, April 18, 2011

April 18, 2011

If my Dad were alive today he would be 109 years old.  He was born this day in 1903.  He died in 1986 and I still miss him every day. 
We had the praise service yesterday and I came away feeling that we did what the Lord wanted us to do;  Praise and worship him.  there were not a lot of people there but those who were there were God's own.
My thanks to Jack and Gwin Tipton, Megan and Christopher Stull  and Leigh Shultz for their singing.  Jen Jinkins for her beautiful solo and  Wayneanne for helping me out in leading the songs.  The prayers that went up were,I know, a sweet smell to our Lord.  Thanks to everyone who made it possible especially Mark Murphy who did sound.
Feeling better today but still have that ole chemo hangover that will last some time more.  I'm eating pretty well except when I get in a hurry and try to take too big of bites.  If I keep it slow I can do ok. I would still like to gulp and wolf down a peck of food.
One more week until I find out what progress all this has made against my cancer.  I pray that it has had some effect.  It would be a shame to go through this and have nothing get better.
God bless you and your house.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Sunday April 17, 2011

I will try to write a little to catch everyone up to date.  I'm feeling sick today and this is the day I plan to have the praise service at church.  I haven't felt this bad in days.  My throat seems better and eating is not as much of a problem but I am just sick at my stomach.  I have not experienced this until now. 
I hope to see everyone at the praise.  Get thee behind me satan. 
God bless you and your house.

Friday, April 15, 2011

April 15, 2011

Sorry for the long silience.  It has been an interesting couple of days.  I have had trouble eating and drinking and therefore not been able to keep  up with anything else.   I guess you could say I am doing better.  I think the problem is that I want to feel much better than I do.  I'm done with this laying around the house but my body says I am not.  I want to be able to work in the garden and cut my own grass.  I want to be able to go back to work.  I want to be able to eat what I want, when I want and not have to take small bites and small sips.  I don't always get what I want and this is one of those times.  I wont say I'm loosing faith but I am loosing patience.  By the time I get through this I will be fully cracked.  I was half cracked before I started. 

I hope all you who read this can come to the praise service at the 1st Baptist Church Sunday at 3:00 PM.  I want to sing in my chains with all who can come and all who cannot should sing were you are.  God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

April 12, 2011

Yesterday I would not have given much hope for my pain and suffering easing up.  Today I awoke after 7 hours of unaided, sleep and was able to eat an egg, a piece of toast, bacon and a cup of tea.  I even drank the tea in gulps.  I recall telling my wife that "if I could just sleep through the night and wake up without pain killers of any kind, then I would feel that I am on the mend.  Well, does God ever do anything half way.  I did all that plus eat a full breakfast.  I have raised my hands and shouted like my great uncle Bob Kennedy.  He was my grandfather's brother. Though I never knew him I have heard stories of how he would shout to the Lord in the field while he worked.  He was not trying to impress anyone except God.
I hope this is a trend.  I have had good days before but this one feels different.  I know that a lot of good people have been praying for this and I cannot thank you enough.  Lets praise God for what he has done.

We plan on having a praise service this Sunday at 3:00 at the 1st Baptist Church in Mt Sterling.  If anything  this will be more unorganized and impromptu than the last one.  I just want anyone who wants to sing to come and sing and anyone who wants to praise or pray to come. I have a PET scan in a week and I want to praise God for healing me before then. Come if you can or praise where you are if you can't.
 If you want to sing, let me know and I will put you on the program.  God bless you and your house.

Monday, April 11, 2011

April 11, 2011

Today has been like the past 5 days.  Impossible to eat and drink and very tired.  I can't wait for the turn around day when I feel better than the day before and it continues day after day.  I look forward to the day when I can say " I am better than yesterday." 
Until that day I will just have to tough it out.  One can take more than one thinks.  The trick is not to thinks too much.  Keep busy and don't think about your problems is the best way.  Another is to concentrate on and pray for someone else and their problems.  Keep the mind occupied.  Pray for others and talk to others.  I will continue an let you know when it breaks to the good side.  God bless you and your house.

Friday, April 8, 2011

April 8,2011

I am recovering from a hard night and morning.  It has been good since about noon.  I have been able to eat and drink this afternoon and that is a good thing.  Not much, but at least I got something down.  I'd give a lot to be able to eat a full meal right now.  Biscuits, beans, taters and a nice pie for desert.  It will come.
My pastor, rick Johnson came by for a visit today and he really picked me up.  We talked about everything and by the time he left I felt much better. He even suggested I take advill as it is an anti inflammatory and I did and it worked.  Thanks Dr. Johnson.  God bless you and your house.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

April 7, 2011

Free at last.  I have no more radiation treatments.  My chemo ended Tuesday a week and a half ago and Now I just have to fight my way back.  On the way home today the Hawk showed himself in great glory.  Pray that I can keep my eye on the hawk and off the tumor. 
I am still feeling much pain when I try to swallow.  If I can just get liquids down me this weekend I won't have to go back to get hydrated.  That's a big if as it hurts so bad, when I swallow that it bends me over and I shout out loud.  Tammy says it's enough to scare anybody in the neighborhood off and that it makes her fear for my life.  Pray that it gets better.  God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

April 6, 2011

Had my treatment and follow up visit with Dr. McGary today.  Other than not being able to eat much and my heart beat being a little high, I'm supposed to br doing ok.  He says I have done remarkable.  I'd hate to see bad.  I had a rough night last night and started feeling better around 8 this morning.  Can't figure out why nights and mornings are so bad.  With chemo and radiation both, it is hard to tell which is responsible.  Or it could be the one of the many medicines I'm taking. I hope it gets better soon. 
Thanks to Sally Hodgson for taking me today.  Enoc Eubank is on deck for my final treatment in this series tomorrow.  It will save a lot of time and money not to have to go to Lexington every day.  Gas is $3.79 here and that takes it's toll. 
I did ot see a Hawk today.  Sometime you just have to have faith when you can't see.  Now is such  time. God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

April 5, 2011

This is the first day I have seen the light in a while.  I have felt almost human today.  I went early today so they could feed me some  IV liquid and Before I could get to my radiation treatment they called me and said the machne had broken down.  So, I came back home and before I could get back home they called me and told me to come back at 2:00 for the treatment.  I went back and just now got home.  That is what I get for having a good day.  I'm not complaining,  I'll take feeling better, along with two trips to Lexington, any day instead of feeling bad all day.
I have two more treatments and I am done.  Praise God.  God bless you and your house.

Monday, April 4, 2011

April 4. 2011

Had my Dr. visit today and she thinks I am doing ok.  She said this is the week that I hit my wall.  I think I hit it last Friday and can't seem to get past it.  I'm dehydraded again so I had to get an IV and stay for an hour and a half extra for that.  Iwill also have to stay each day this week until Thursday and get more liquieds.  My pain is about 12 on a scale of 1-10.  Dr arnold told me that I was tougher than most of her patiences.  She feels I am doing extremely well considering what I have been through.  I don't know so much about that.  I don't feel so tough right now. I have many friends praying  for me and I know I have much support.  I saw a Cooper's Hawk today but no Red Tail. 

Sunday, April 3, 2011

April 3,2011

It is 11:14 and the first time I have been up today.  Last night wasn't so bad but today has been pretty tiring.  Haven't been able to sit up much without getting really tired.  I ate a little and feel some better now.  I'm going to try to get outside some and enjoy this beautiful weather today.  I hope I get some answers from my appointment with Dr. Arnold tomorrow so I can not fear everytime I get a new symptom.  I am more afraid of all the pin killers and pills they have me on than I am anything else.  I feel like I'm out of it most of the time and I do not like it.  For some reason or another I feel like the drugs are making me feel spacy but it may all be part of the chemo experience.  I did not feel this way on the last round of chemo but it may be different this time.  Anybody out there know about these things?  I could use someone with experience about now. Hope to write more tomorrow.  God bless you and your house.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

April 2, 2011

Woa Nellie, it has been a hard couple of days.  I started feeling better this afternoon after Tammy talked me into eating some chicken soup.  I fought it but gave in and found that I could actually eat it and afterward it made me feel better.  Mom knows best.  So far I have felt much better this afternoon and hope this is a trend.  The last two days have been an up and down ride.  I can't tell if it is the effects of the chemo or the pain meds. or both.  Whatever it is. it's something I don't want to do again.  I do know that the pain from the radiation is getting much worse and the pain medicine is not working as well. The prayers have come and that has sustained me and I will never forget those who pray.  God Bless you and your house.

Friday, April 1, 2011

April 1,011

I can only write a little.  It has been a hard day. Had to get two bags of saline in me this day and have been in a lot of pain.  I  guess this was my day to go down.  I feel a little better this evening but I'm a long way from feeling good.  I hope tomorrow is a better day.  I don't have treatments this weekend and I plan to rest the whole time.  Please pray that things turn around. God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

March 30, 2011

No more chemo and 5 more radiations.  I still feel like heck from the chemo but knowing I have no more is a big help.  Visited Dr. McCary today and his assistant Dr. Feddox.  They always spend a lot of time with me and today was no exception.  Let me see if I can get this straight so I can get everrybody up to date.
After my last radiation treatment next Wednesday, I will wait a month an then get an MRI.  I have to wait because the radiation will still be killing cells that long.  Dependendng on what the MRI shows, We may have to do two more intense radiations that really pin point the original cancer cells in the lung.( there is a 50/50 chance that will have to be done.  If the cancer is not there at all, we are done unless it returns( 1 in 3 chances)  If it has returned we will take aim again. 
Both Dr. Feddox and Dr. McGary were very upbeat and positive and felt that I had done very well and that the cancer is responding well to treatment.  I am hopeful. 
I feel a little better today than yesterday but still having a hard time swollowing.  I hope that gets better as I am hungry and want to eat.
Kyle went back to NC today and we miss him as he is a great help around here and in taking me to the treatments.  He will return next week.
Think I will try to get to church tonight so I'll try to write more tomorrow.  God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

March 29, 2011

Going on the last round of chemo today.  I feel pretty weak and sick today but able to go on and get this thing over with. I don't know what the future holds in terms of more treatments.  I am to meet with Dr. Arnold on the 4th of April to discuss that.  I see Dr. McGary Wed. but won't finish radiation until next Wed., so I doube he will tell me anything yet.  Keep me in prayer and believe that God has already healed me.  I believe he has. 
It is cool and cloudy here today so no sunshine to brighten my day.  Kyle is taking me today so I'm in good hands.  God bless you and your house.

Monday, March 28, 2011

March 28, 2011

Kyle and I are going into chemo for the next to lst round.  I will be so glad when chemo is over. We ad a rough time yesterday evening afte my infusion because of sickness but feel fairly good today.

Lawd, Lawd got them chemo blues
From the top of my bald head
To the bottom of my numb shoes.
Ain't no body can say I ain't paid my dues
Lawd, Lawd got them chemo blues.

Went to the wig store to make me feel more a man
I went to that wig store make me feel more a man.
They say we ain't got nothin' to make you young again.

I look to the heavens to get some comfort there
I look to the heavens  to get some comfort there
That old Hawk he done told me
You know Jesus is always there

I look at the wig man
and smile like I ain't never smiled
I look at that wig man
And smiles like I ain't never smiled
He don't understand
I think he's gettti'n riled.

Lawed lawed I got them Chemo blues
Lawd lawd got them chemo blues
But that old hawk he done told me
Don't worry no more
' Bout them blues.

God bless you and your house.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

March 27, 2011

Just a short note before I go to Sunday school.  Yesterday went pretty good at chemo except they had to change out my IV port for some reason or another and it to 3 sticks to get it in.  Seems that chemo wrecks your veins and mine are no exception.  We were there for about 4 hours when it should have been three.  Today I go for a 1:30 session.
I am going to take my guitar to Sunday school and teach a lesson on love and try to work in how to REALLY celebrate and PRAISE the Lord.  I don't remember him, but they tell me that my great uncle Bob Kennedy would get so into praising God that he would shout in the fields where he was working on his farm.  I wish we all could be like that and not limit it to Sundays.  Anyway, pray that all goes well for the lesson and that satan doesn't raise his ugly head.  God Bless you and your house.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

March 26, 2011

I saied through the first day of chemo and did not feel bad at any point.  I know there was much prayer all around for me or it would not have turned out that way.  I am going for round 2 today and it is only have of what I got yesterday. NO MORE SYPLATINUM(sp im sure).  That's the evil one.
Each morning I read a list of reasons why God does not want or allow cancer in my body.  I is in a book that was given to me bu Enoc Eubank.  It says things like; tumors you are not allowed in my body because I am indwelled by by Jesus etc.  I have about 10 of those I read out loud during my pray for myself and others.  Yesterday morning I got this "still small voice" that said, " I heard that the first time you read it and I healed you then.  I,m not deaf  and you can stop now.  You are the one in the way of healing."  It hit me like a ton of Bricks.  I am the one who needs to believe  in the healing power of God and those prayin fo me.  Yesterday was a little preview of what He was talking about.  The prayers of many people were answered in that I did not get wrecked by the chemo.  Oh how little fath I have.  So, My brothers and sisters. Pray for my faith to grow so that I may help others to do likewise.
Another thing that lifted my sprits yesterday was I had the same nurse I had the fist day of my chemo the last time I went through it.  I never saw her again after that meeting and she didn't  remember me.(no hair now, me not her).  When I told her that I remembered her because she was the one nurse who had that something extra that caused me to remember her she said "Oh You are the guy with the hawk. You know I see them every where now."  I said that she should remember who sent it not me or the hawk.  I know that God reaches people and any way he can.  I can start a Hawk menistry.  Does anyone out there make Tshirts.  I need one with a hawk and some phrase on it about God.
God also has a since of humor.  Yesterday we did not see a single hawk.  But two geese landed on top of a building next door to us while I was in chemo and one of them looked over the ledge( you could just see his head and a little neck), as if to say, "I don't know why I'm here but God said to look in on you so here's to you pal".  We all laughed and I heard God laugh too.  God bless you and your house.

Friday, March 25, 2011

MARCH 25,2011

Just got back from chemo and I am still standing.  Not feeling as bad as I thought I would but feeling rough just the same.  I thank God that I made it through without major problems.  Thanks for your prayers and May God bless you and your house.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

March 24, 2011

I have had a time with these beta blockers.  Yesterday I went to a full pill two times a day and it made me very nervous.  Heart rate actually went up.  I go this morning for treatment then I have an ultra sound of my heart and visit the cardioligist' nurse afterward.  I took the pill this morning and am ready to jump out of my hide.  I start chemo tomorrow and want to do that with  my heart back to normal.
Robin Carrington took be to my treatment yesterday and I thank her very much.  All these people giving their time for me is so humbling.
  All went well with treatment and Dr. McGary said I seemed to be doing fine and that I have 10 more radiation treatments.  I met with him and Dr. Feddock yesterday and both said I was doing well.  I'd hate to be doing badly if this is well. I gues I shoud not complain because,  so far, I'm able to get around and I am eating good.  Some I see there are not doing as well. I am just ready to start feeling better and the chemo tomorrow is going to prevent that.  I am just fighting the blues.  " Lawed, Lawed. got them chemo blues, I said, Lawed, Lawed got them chemo blues. from the top of my bald head to the bottom of my dragging shoes."  God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

March 23, 2011

Another slow start today.  I'm having trouble getting started the last couple of days.  I'm weak and sick at my stomach each morning.  Yesterday it took almost half a day to get feeling better but when I did it felt good the rest of the day.  I hope today does better but right now I don't feel that great.
The mental battle is getting harder to fight.  Seems like I get one thing fixed and another comes to take it's place.  My heart beat is too fast for the doctors so they put me on a beta  blocker and that has not made it better, just made me slower.  I've had these sick mornings since I started taking them.
I visit Dr. McGary today so I will get his take on all of this.  He does not always agree with the other doctors. My kind of guy.  Keep praying and may God bless you and your house.

Monday, March 21, 2011

March 21, 2011

Spring has arrived and I like it.  It has been great here the last two days.  My pain has subsided with the medication and that has a good effect on me.  The medication does give me a drugged feeling however, that keeps me from doing what I like.  I still don't feel safe driving a car. I guess that is a good trade off.  I'd rather not drive and feel no pain that the other way around. 
I go for radiation at 1:00 p.m. today followed by a visit with a cardiologist.  This is a follow up from last weeks rapid heart beat episode.  Dr Arnold wanted to be safe before we start chemo again.  Might as well give more money to someone else as we go.  I now owe my the rest of my life's income to UK medical center.
I continue to see the Hawk and t gives great comfort to me.  The greatest comfort, however, is knowing that friends and family are praying for me and keeping in touch with your kid notes.  Keep them coming.  Thanks L. J. for your note.  Blessings on you all and may God bless you and your house.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

March 19, 2011

Just coming off a couple of bad days and feeling much better.  I finally listened to the Doctor and started to take the pain meds she prescribed.  I was trying to make it on Tylenoll and Motrin but it was not working.  Come to find out, it was the pain that was causing everything else to go wrong.  I started to take the prescribed meds yesterday and feel much better today except for the fog in my head. I also found if I get up at 3 or 4 in the morning and take pain medication, I feel better when I get up at 6.  I just hope I'm not a junky when I get through this.
After a particular bad day on Wednesday Tammy and I were stopped at a stop light in Lexington when we were surprised to see one of the largest hawks I have ever seen.  He flew in and circled above our car until the light changed, then moved on when we moved.  He was riding the warm air currents and never once flapped his wings.  Needless to say, hope was renewed in our souls. Laughing Hawk is always there.
I hope to be able to get out and do a little something today.  Our fridge broke day before yesterday and it will be Monday before we get the part it needs.  A lot of food went bad and we are living in non refrigerated food this weekend.  Roughing it.  Anyway, thank you all for your prayers and support and may God bless you and your house.


Thursday, March 17, 2011

March 17, 2011

And a wonderful St. Patrick's day to you all.( me mother was a Kennedy).  Had a bad day yesterday and could not get up enough energy to write.  I feel some better today but still a little weak.  I am going to the doctor today for a check up before chemo starts tomorrow.  I don't feel that strong but my guess is they will whip it on me anyway.
Yesterday morning I thought I was having a heart attack.  My chest hurt, my right arm was tingling and I was sweating all over.  I went to the emergency room and they said my heart was fine and that it was effects of the radiation and chemo. so if I do have a heart attack now I would never know it. I'd just think it was the radiation.  Never a dull moment.
I change radiation procedures today.  I use a different machine for a more targeted radiation that will concentrate on the tumor and not hit the surrounding areas as much.  The thing is shrinking and Dr. McGary says we will get it.  He says the bigger problem is keeping it from coming back. He is unaware of the laughing Hawk.  Let all of us keep praying that it goes away and never comes back.  God is much bigger than this tumor. 
I continue to see hawks on my way to radiation each day.  Yesterday one flew very close to the car. I know I am not alone in this and that God reminds me of this daily.  Keep the faith and God bless you and your house.

Monday, March 14, 2011

March 14, 2011

I can't seem to get two days in a row of feeling good. Today was a real challenge. I woke up feeling pain and totalt exhausted. All day I have hugged the couch and have been good for nothing. Yesterday was one of the best days I've had. I pray that things improve befor chemo starts on Friday. Need to sleep. I'll try for more tomorrow. God bless you and your house.

Friday, March 11, 2011

March 11, 2011

Results of MRI were clear With no cancer in the brain. Eased my mind a lot. Not feeling too bad today but I am really tired. I thank brother Mack for staying the last 2 days and taking me to my treatments.he has been a great help.
Thank God for the good report and may God bless you and your house.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

March 10, 2011

The latest is that they did a MRI scan yesterday to see if cancer had spread to my brain.  No results yet.  My left foot was acting strange( still is), and they think it may be something in my brain.  I guess they will make me wait to hear the results.  Pray that it is something else that is causing it. 
I've had some very bad days this week.  I'm ready to move on and start feeling better.  Pray that this thing turns around soon because I start chemo again next Thursday. God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

March 8, 2011

I'm sorry for the silence for the last couple of days.  I spent all day yesterday in the emergency room.  Couldn't get my heart rate below 114 and everybody panicked.  I told them my sugar was up and I thought that was causing that.  Wouldn't take that as the answer and kept me all day and finally at 7:00 PM they did a ct scan with dye to see if I had a blood clot( nothing I worried about untl they mentioned it) . Came back and said it was not a clot and the only thing they could figure was my sugar. Well, Boy Howdy, was that not what I had been telling them all day.  That plus my stress level, from being kept there all day. The only thing good that came out of the day was they said it looked like my tumor had shrunk a bit.  ( that was mentioned as an aside).
My sugar was down to 145 this morning and I took meds. for it and it was down to 111 by lunch and heart rate went down to 88-90.  I hope this fixes it and things improve from here on.  You all out there keep praying and hoping that it does too.  God bless you and your house.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Saturdat March 5, 2011

I have had two fairly good days.  Yesterday was an exellent day compared with the last few and today was almost as good.  My heart beat is still fast but other than that and having difficult to swallowing, I have been much better.  I hope this is a pattern.  We may go out to eat this evening if I hold up.  I think I will pray that this is the turning point in this first round and that I will continue to get better untill round two starts on the 18th of March.  God bless you and your house.

Friday, March 4, 2011

March 4, 2011

Regular radiation treatment this morning transported by Vicki Clark.  Thank you Vicki.  I had a super fast heart beat in the middle of the night caused by an antibiotic I was taking.  They took me off of that today.  I had to beg and show them the warning on the lit. that came with the meds.  I feel some better right now but I have not made the bottom curve yet.  I can't wait to start feeling better.  I hope it's soon.  only two weeks until my next round of chemo and I want to get back to my fighting weight by then.  That was 15 lbs. ago. Emily and Ben, my dayghter and son in law, are coming this evening to help out and I look foward to their visit.  Hope everyone has a good weekend and God bless your house.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

March 3, 2011 Srinking Tumor,Laughing Hawk.

About 3:45 this morning I had a hard time and laying there I ,don't know if I was asleep or awake, ( At this time of the morning all you can do is lay there and pray to God to ease the pain and help you go back to sleep),  I had this dream or vision that I was in a flat endless desert and it was blazing hot.  I looked up and could see this hawk flying above leadeing me in a certain direction.  I called out that I needed more, like a hand to hold.  Suddenly I was in a place near a rock and the hawk was shilding me from the sun with his wings.It was an answer to much prayer.
I had my treatment this morning, then had a CT scan then spent a long time talking with my Doctor( McGary). He said that all of the pains I am having are normal for where I am in the treatment process.  Have to go to softer foods at room temp. and e gave me a sollution called Dr. McGary's Magic Mouth Wash, that he said would numb the pain if I let a tablespoon trickel down my throat 5 min. befor I eat. Havent tried it yet but I plan to tomorrow.  They are going to reduce the area of radiation and make it a stronger shot starting Monday after they get the Ct scan results.
I have to change my diet so I can get my sugar levels down.  I also need to loose weight.  That means I have to eat protein, lots of fat and cut back on carbs and sugar.  Couple that with the soft room temp. stuff and you have absolutely nothing to eat but snowballs, briers and twigs He also gave me new pain drugs that will probably make me goofy.  He said better goofy than hurting.  I'm not so sure of that.
That's al the news worth reading from this end.  May God bless you all.  Thank you Ron for taaking me today.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

March 2, 2011

Canceled my radiation today because the machine broke again.  This is twice in the last week the thing has gone down.  Makes me wonder if is working right when we use it.
Looked in the mirror this morning and after trying to figure out who I was looking at I decided It  is time to start me a new singing act.  I think I'll go country this time and call myself the rube headed stranger.  Look out Willie, here I come.
I'm going to take the rest of the day and rest. I thank the Lord for this day as it looks beautiful outside.  Seems like they look better all the time. 

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

March 1 2011

Today I awoke with a slight fever(99.8)  and have not felt good all day.  They put me on an anti biotic this evening as a precaution. My cough has gotten worse and it's making it hard to sleep.  Seems to get worse by the day. 
I went for radiation today and they said I am to have a CT scan tomorrow and then they are going to change the program a little bit.  Not sure what that means but I guess they are going to me more intense.  Radiation makes it hard to get food down and makes me tired.  Chemo is working overtime and my hair is mostly gone.
Carlie Bowen came to see me today and picked my day up quite  bit.  We ad some time to talk and reflect and it was like old times.  I was sorry that I could not play music todaybut the visit raised my spirits. Thanks Charlie for your visit.

Monday, February 28, 2011

Feb. 28, 2011 Srinking Tumor, Laughing Hawk

Woo Nellie!  Hair every where.  I look like a dog with the itch( that's "each" to you folks back  home).  There is an old warner Bro. cartoon of a witch that when she moves, hair pins fly off.  Well, when I move hair flys off.  I had no idea I had so much hair.  It has fallen out for 3 days and I still have enough to see.  Not for long. 
Had a good day Saturday and a poor day yesterday.  So far today, I feel fair.  Have to go for radiation a today so it will get me out of the house.  I did get to Sunday School and Church yesterday. 
I seem to have a lot of pain in my throat and makes it hard to eat anything tha is not soft.  Some days are worse than others.  This morning wasn't so bad. I think I have not gained back the 10 or 11 pounds I lost so I have got to keep eating and the throat thing makes it more difficult.
Thunder and lightning here this morning and looks like I'll have to take out right in the midddle of it.  Mark Murphy is taking me this morning. 

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Feb.26, 2011 Srinking tumor, Laughing Hawk

Boy does this thing change from hour to hour. One minute I'm ok and the next I feel like the world is closing in.  One must meditate on the Laughing Hawk consistently to get through it.  Yesterday I felt fine physically but the chemical change from not taking steroids and chemo just had my head in a terrible state.  Slept without aid last night for a few hours.  Sleep is still shallow and I dream most of the night. Right now fatigue is the biggest problem plus my lower throat and esophagus are very sore which makes it hard to swallow.

Going to try to get through the day without crashing today and hope that tomorrow brings better times.  Thank you Lord for this day and your help.

Hair started to go this morning. I'm looking for a good hat to help me through that.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Feb. 25,2011

Te srinking tumor fought back late yesterrday and last night.  Lots of lower back bain and sleeplessness.  Don't know why my lower back started hurting.  That is close to nothing that we are fighting.  Seems like enimies find your weak spot no matter where it is.  At any rate had a fairly rough night but did manage to sleep some.  My radiation treatment yesterday was later than usual because one of their machines was broken and all patients had to share the same one.  It was fine.  Upset the tech more than it did me.  Brother Dave Evans took me and I thank him for giving up his afternoon. Kevin Tudor is on duty today and I am so greatful for these people.

Talked to much family from WV yesterday and We hear Emma loved "River Dance" night before last.  Good ole Irish girl that she is. Talked with cuzz Doug at length and things in Corton seem to be as usual,(that would be pretty dead).  That ws a good place to grow up but wouldn't want to live there.

I go back this morning and I hope the machine is fixed.  I also hope I get some strength back and that my back stops hurting.  Pray that we have a good weekend.  At least I have a 2 day break from Lexington.
I pray that the Lord blesses each and everyone and their house.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Feb. 24, 2011 Srinking Tumor, Laughing Hawk

Today we change the theme a little bit.  I woke up this morning feeling a little better and hungry.  I think we will go to Japanese film mode on this thing.  We'll gonna call it "Shrinking Tumor, Laughing Hawk".  So from now on the enemey is the srinking tumor and the victor is the laughin Hawk.( You know who the Hawk Is).

Had radiation yesterday and it went well.  Doctor check up was uneventful as I have not been through enough torture to tell anyting yet.(They keep thinking I will talk but I'll never give in.)  I go back later today for the treatment because something happened to their radiation machine( I broke it) and can't get it fixed by this morning.  I go at 1:30. 
I did get to church last night and that was a good thing.  I am gettting help from a lot of people and I thank all of them.  Thanks for all the things.  Rose Ginter, I don't know you other than through Charlie but I know that you are a friend of mine. Thank you.  Thanks to Clint and Mary  and david Gilllispie for your help. And thanks to brothers Mack and Ted for checking on me.  My kids have helped in so many ways and I thank them.
I hope this Movie wins aa Oscar."Srinking Tumor, Laughing Hawl.  Staring Yours Truly And The Lord.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Feb. 22, 2011

I'm late in getting to this today.  I have had a couple of hard days but I still have do pretty well considering all the junk I have in my body now.  Chemo is over for a while but the effects linger on.  Still hard to eat and not feel sick but that is what I have to do.  I have to eat and keep my strength up.  Today was better than yesterday and I hope tomorrow will be better than today.  I have one more day to take steroids and I hope I feel better when I'm off those things.  I have a feeling that I will.
I go for my8th radiation treatment tomorrow and I will also see my radiation doctor.  Not much to tell by then but he may have some insight into how I feel and why.  Looking in the mirror today I looked 10 years older than last week. Scared me and I ain't afraid of much. 

Monday, February 21, 2011

Feb. 21, 2011

Very bad day yesterday followed by very bad night.  The sickness is powerful.  I try to stay above it but it is hard.  Went for radiation treatment this morning and made it through ok.  The ride to and from is the hard part.  I hope it settles down today and I can get back to some normal feelings.  So far I have not had much of a day.

Tammy is with me today and that is always better to be with her.  She is such a great help in all ways.  I think I will go take a rest and maybe try to catch up on the writing later.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Sunday Feb 20, 2011

Yesterday was a fairly good day until the night came on.  The steroids I'm taking make the nights long and tense.  I can't sleep but I don't hurt so I just have to lay there and think.  Too much thinking can get you into trouble so I try not to think.  I usually settle down about 4:00am and then I'm up at 5:30 or 6:00 ready to go
The week end as been a good one.  Tammy and I went out for two outings so I could get some exercise while the weather is good.   Can't do too much but it makes me feel better to go and do something for a little while rather than sit and do nothing.  Dr. Mc Garry said it was best not to sit down and to eat as much as I can.  I do both and both do help me feel better.  Good friends calling and stopping by are a great help.  Brother Mack calls often and that keeps the family connection going.  Ted checks in every now and then also. 

I'm getting ready to go to Church and that has its fear factor.  Now is the time that I can catch stuff as my system goes down so I have to watch hugs and hand shakes and little kids especially. 

O yeah,  My furnace quit working this morning.  What's up with that.  Hope we can find someone to fix it on Sunday.  It will get cold in here tonight. 

Just radiation tomorrrow and Tammy is taking me; should be in and out on 20 min. 
Thanks to everyone for the help and God bless you all and your house.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Day 9

I'm a little late in posting today.  The last chemo treatment in this series is a killer.  I spent all day (6+hrs.) in the seat today.  When I got home it felt like I had been run over by truck.  Daughter Emily accompanied me to and from and spent the day watching me get the junk dripping into my system. My kids sure are a help in this. All in all I have come through this first round without too much discomfort.
 As I go into and out of the center each day I am amazed by how many people are going through this regimen each day with me.  It's a steady stream of patients and there seems to be no end.  You never notice anything as much as when you are a part of it. 
The best of the day was during the middle of the treatment.  I looked out the window and pointed out to Emily that up there was my hawk.  He flew in over the area circled above my window and sailed off, as if to say.  "I will never forsake you."

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Day 7

Today has been a fair day.  Had my radiation at 9:00 am and was back home by 10:00 am.  Took the MG Midget for a ride and enjoyed the spring-like day.  I feel fairly good today as I have not had chemo for two days.  Last night was a little rough with pain and not much sleep but all and all I think I had a pretty good 24 hours.  Tomorrow is a six hour session with chemo preceded by radiation.  That should be my last chemo for 28 days.  It will also be a hard one because of the length of infusion.  They say that 14 days from tomorrow will be my worst time as far as recovery from chemo.  I pray that it will be easier than I think and that the good Lord will spare me the worst.  I think He will. 
Hope to continue this each day so you can keep tabs on me.  It is good for me also and I will try my best to keep up.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Update Day 5

This is the first day of my blog.  I have decided to update friends and foes alike about my cancer treatment as the days go by.  Yesterday( the fourt day of treatment) was by far the worst yet.  I suppose it will only get worse from here on until I get through this.  With God's help and good friends to pray and help, I will get through this.  I go for my 5th chemo treatment and 2nd radiation treatment today.  Daughter Meg will go with me today.  My kids are all saints through all this.  They have all helped so much.  My wife Tammy is the one I lean on most.  Of course I have been leaning on her for 30 years now.  She has been and continues to be my rock..

I'll try to give updates as I can on this blogg but I never know how I am going to feel.  I could not have done it yesterday.  Today I awoke with the words to an old hymn "Hallelujah, thine the glory, Halleujah, amen.  Hallelujah thine the glory. Revive us again."  Sing that with me today.