Wednesday, March 30, 2011

March 30, 2011

No more chemo and 5 more radiations.  I still feel like heck from the chemo but knowing I have no more is a big help.  Visited Dr. McCary today and his assistant Dr. Feddox.  They always spend a lot of time with me and today was no exception.  Let me see if I can get this straight so I can get everrybody up to date.
After my last radiation treatment next Wednesday, I will wait a month an then get an MRI.  I have to wait because the radiation will still be killing cells that long.  Dependendng on what the MRI shows, We may have to do two more intense radiations that really pin point the original cancer cells in the lung.( there is a 50/50 chance that will have to be done.  If the cancer is not there at all, we are done unless it returns( 1 in 3 chances)  If it has returned we will take aim again. 
Both Dr. Feddox and Dr. McGary were very upbeat and positive and felt that I had done very well and that the cancer is responding well to treatment.  I am hopeful. 
I feel a little better today than yesterday but still having a hard time swollowing.  I hope that gets better as I am hungry and want to eat.
Kyle went back to NC today and we miss him as he is a great help around here and in taking me to the treatments.  He will return next week.
Think I will try to get to church tonight so I'll try to write more tomorrow.  God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

March 29, 2011

Going on the last round of chemo today.  I feel pretty weak and sick today but able to go on and get this thing over with. I don't know what the future holds in terms of more treatments.  I am to meet with Dr. Arnold on the 4th of April to discuss that.  I see Dr. McGary Wed. but won't finish radiation until next Wed., so I doube he will tell me anything yet.  Keep me in prayer and believe that God has already healed me.  I believe he has. 
It is cool and cloudy here today so no sunshine to brighten my day.  Kyle is taking me today so I'm in good hands.  God bless you and your house.

Monday, March 28, 2011

March 28, 2011

Kyle and I are going into chemo for the next to lst round.  I will be so glad when chemo is over. We ad a rough time yesterday evening afte my infusion because of sickness but feel fairly good today.

Lawd, Lawd got them chemo blues
From the top of my bald head
To the bottom of my numb shoes.
Ain't no body can say I ain't paid my dues
Lawd, Lawd got them chemo blues.

Went to the wig store to make me feel more a man
I went to that wig store make me feel more a man.
They say we ain't got nothin' to make you young again.

I look to the heavens to get some comfort there
I look to the heavens  to get some comfort there
That old Hawk he done told me
You know Jesus is always there

I look at the wig man
and smile like I ain't never smiled
I look at that wig man
And smiles like I ain't never smiled
He don't understand
I think he's gettti'n riled.

Lawed lawed I got them Chemo blues
Lawd lawd got them chemo blues
But that old hawk he done told me
Don't worry no more
' Bout them blues.

God bless you and your house.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

March 27, 2011

Just a short note before I go to Sunday school.  Yesterday went pretty good at chemo except they had to change out my IV port for some reason or another and it to 3 sticks to get it in.  Seems that chemo wrecks your veins and mine are no exception.  We were there for about 4 hours when it should have been three.  Today I go for a 1:30 session.
I am going to take my guitar to Sunday school and teach a lesson on love and try to work in how to REALLY celebrate and PRAISE the Lord.  I don't remember him, but they tell me that my great uncle Bob Kennedy would get so into praising God that he would shout in the fields where he was working on his farm.  I wish we all could be like that and not limit it to Sundays.  Anyway, pray that all goes well for the lesson and that satan doesn't raise his ugly head.  God Bless you and your house.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

March 26, 2011

I saied through the first day of chemo and did not feel bad at any point.  I know there was much prayer all around for me or it would not have turned out that way.  I am going for round 2 today and it is only have of what I got yesterday. NO MORE SYPLATINUM(sp im sure).  That's the evil one.
 
Each morning I read a list of reasons why God does not want or allow cancer in my body.  I is in a book that was given to me bu Enoc Eubank.  It says things like; tumors you are not allowed in my body because I am indwelled by by Jesus etc.  I have about 10 of those I read out loud during my pray for myself and others.  Yesterday morning I got this "still small voice" that said, " I heard that the first time you read it and I healed you then.  I,m not deaf  and you can stop now.  You are the one in the way of healing."  It hit me like a ton of Bricks.  I am the one who needs to believe  in the healing power of God and those prayin fo me.  Yesterday was a little preview of what He was talking about.  The prayers of many people were answered in that I did not get wrecked by the chemo.  Oh how little fath I have.  So, My brothers and sisters. Pray for my faith to grow so that I may help others to do likewise.
Another thing that lifted my sprits yesterday was I had the same nurse I had the fist day of my chemo the last time I went through it.  I never saw her again after that meeting and she didn't  remember me.(no hair now, me not her).  When I told her that I remembered her because she was the one nurse who had that something extra that caused me to remember her she said "Oh You are the guy with the hawk. You know I see them every where now."  I said that she should remember who sent it not me or the hawk.  I know that God reaches people and any way he can.  I can start a Hawk menistry.  Does anyone out there make Tshirts.  I need one with a hawk and some phrase on it about God.
God also has a since of humor.  Yesterday we did not see a single hawk.  But two geese landed on top of a building next door to us while I was in chemo and one of them looked over the ledge( you could just see his head and a little neck), as if to say, "I don't know why I'm here but God said to look in on you so here's to you pal".  We all laughed and I heard God laugh too.  God bless you and your house.

Friday, March 25, 2011

MARCH 25,2011

Just got back from chemo and I am still standing.  Not feeling as bad as I thought I would but feeling rough just the same.  I thank God that I made it through without major problems.  Thanks for your prayers and May God bless you and your house.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

March 24, 2011

I have had a time with these beta blockers.  Yesterday I went to a full pill two times a day and it made me very nervous.  Heart rate actually went up.  I go this morning for treatment then I have an ultra sound of my heart and visit the cardioligist' nurse afterward.  I took the pill this morning and am ready to jump out of my hide.  I start chemo tomorrow and want to do that with  my heart back to normal.
Robin Carrington took be to my treatment yesterday and I thank her very much.  All these people giving their time for me is so humbling.
  All went well with treatment and Dr. McGary said I seemed to be doing fine and that I have 10 more radiation treatments.  I met with him and Dr. Feddock yesterday and both said I was doing well.  I'd hate to be doing badly if this is well. I gues I shoud not complain because,  so far, I'm able to get around and I am eating good.  Some I see there are not doing as well. I am just ready to start feeling better and the chemo tomorrow is going to prevent that.  I am just fighting the blues.  " Lawed, Lawed. got them chemo blues, I said, Lawed, Lawed got them chemo blues. from the top of my bald head to the bottom of my dragging shoes."  God bless you and your house.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

March 23, 2011

Another slow start today.  I'm having trouble getting started the last couple of days.  I'm weak and sick at my stomach each morning.  Yesterday it took almost half a day to get feeling better but when I did it felt good the rest of the day.  I hope today does better but right now I don't feel that great.
The mental battle is getting harder to fight.  Seems like I get one thing fixed and another comes to take it's place.  My heart beat is too fast for the doctors so they put me on a beta  blocker and that has not made it better, just made me slower.  I've had these sick mornings since I started taking them.
I visit Dr. McGary today so I will get his take on all of this.  He does not always agree with the other doctors. My kind of guy.  Keep praying and may God bless you and your house.

Monday, March 21, 2011

March 21, 2011

Spring has arrived and I like it.  It has been great here the last two days.  My pain has subsided with the medication and that has a good effect on me.  The medication does give me a drugged feeling however, that keeps me from doing what I like.  I still don't feel safe driving a car. I guess that is a good trade off.  I'd rather not drive and feel no pain that the other way around. 
I go for radiation at 1:00 p.m. today followed by a visit with a cardiologist.  This is a follow up from last weeks rapid heart beat episode.  Dr Arnold wanted to be safe before we start chemo again.  Might as well give more money to someone else as we go.  I now owe my the rest of my life's income to UK medical center.
I continue to see the Hawk and t gives great comfort to me.  The greatest comfort, however, is knowing that friends and family are praying for me and keeping in touch with your kid notes.  Keep them coming.  Thanks L. J. for your note.  Blessings on you all and may God bless you and your house.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

March 19, 2011

Just coming off a couple of bad days and feeling much better.  I finally listened to the Doctor and started to take the pain meds she prescribed.  I was trying to make it on Tylenoll and Motrin but it was not working.  Come to find out, it was the pain that was causing everything else to go wrong.  I started to take the prescribed meds yesterday and feel much better today except for the fog in my head. I also found if I get up at 3 or 4 in the morning and take pain medication, I feel better when I get up at 6.  I just hope I'm not a junky when I get through this.
After a particular bad day on Wednesday Tammy and I were stopped at a stop light in Lexington when we were surprised to see one of the largest hawks I have ever seen.  He flew in and circled above our car until the light changed, then moved on when we moved.  He was riding the warm air currents and never once flapped his wings.  Needless to say, hope was renewed in our souls. Laughing Hawk is always there.
I hope to be able to get out and do a little something today.  Our fridge broke day before yesterday and it will be Monday before we get the part it needs.  A lot of food went bad and we are living in non refrigerated food this weekend.  Roughing it.  Anyway, thank you all for your prayers and support and may God bless you and your house.

Roger

Thursday, March 17, 2011

March 17, 2011

And a wonderful St. Patrick's day to you all.( me mother was a Kennedy).  Had a bad day yesterday and could not get up enough energy to write.  I feel some better today but still a little weak.  I am going to the doctor today for a check up before chemo starts tomorrow.  I don't feel that strong but my guess is they will whip it on me anyway.
Yesterday morning I thought I was having a heart attack.  My chest hurt, my right arm was tingling and I was sweating all over.  I went to the emergency room and they said my heart was fine and that it was effects of the radiation and chemo. so if I do have a heart attack now I would never know it. I'd just think it was the radiation.  Never a dull moment.
I change radiation procedures today.  I use a different machine for a more targeted radiation that will concentrate on the tumor and not hit the surrounding areas as much.  The thing is shrinking and Dr. McGary says we will get it.  He says the bigger problem is keeping it from coming back. He is unaware of the laughing Hawk.  Let all of us keep praying that it goes away and never comes back.  God is much bigger than this tumor. 
I continue to see hawks on my way to radiation each day.  Yesterday one flew very close to the car. I know I am not alone in this and that God reminds me of this daily.  Keep the faith and God bless you and your house.

Monday, March 14, 2011

March 14, 2011

I can't seem to get two days in a row of feeling good. Today was a real challenge. I woke up feeling pain and totalt exhausted. All day I have hugged the couch and have been good for nothing. Yesterday was one of the best days I've had. I pray that things improve befor chemo starts on Friday. Need to sleep. I'll try for more tomorrow. God bless you and your house.

Friday, March 11, 2011

March 11, 2011

Results of MRI were clear With no cancer in the brain. Eased my mind a lot. Not feeling too bad today but I am really tired. I thank brother Mack for staying the last 2 days and taking me to my treatments.he has been a great help.
Thank God for the good report and may God bless you and your house.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

March 10, 2011

The latest is that they did a MRI scan yesterday to see if cancer had spread to my brain.  No results yet.  My left foot was acting strange( still is), and they think it may be something in my brain.  I guess they will make me wait to hear the results.  Pray that it is something else that is causing it. 
I've had some very bad days this week.  I'm ready to move on and start feeling better.  Pray that this thing turns around soon because I start chemo again next Thursday. God bless you and your house.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

March 8, 2011

I'm sorry for the silence for the last couple of days.  I spent all day yesterday in the emergency room.  Couldn't get my heart rate below 114 and everybody panicked.  I told them my sugar was up and I thought that was causing that.  Wouldn't take that as the answer and kept me all day and finally at 7:00 PM they did a ct scan with dye to see if I had a blood clot( nothing I worried about untl they mentioned it) . Came back and said it was not a clot and the only thing they could figure was my sugar. Well, Boy Howdy, was that not what I had been telling them all day.  That plus my stress level, from being kept there all day. The only thing good that came out of the day was they said it looked like my tumor had shrunk a bit.  ( that was mentioned as an aside).
My sugar was down to 145 this morning and I took meds. for it and it was down to 111 by lunch and heart rate went down to 88-90.  I hope this fixes it and things improve from here on.  You all out there keep praying and hoping that it does too.  God bless you and your house.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Saturdat March 5, 2011

I have had two fairly good days.  Yesterday was an exellent day compared with the last few and today was almost as good.  My heart beat is still fast but other than that and having difficult to swallowing, I have been much better.  I hope this is a pattern.  We may go out to eat this evening if I hold up.  I think I will pray that this is the turning point in this first round and that I will continue to get better untill round two starts on the 18th of March.  God bless you and your house.

Friday, March 4, 2011

March 4, 2011

Regular radiation treatment this morning transported by Vicki Clark.  Thank you Vicki.  I had a super fast heart beat in the middle of the night caused by an antibiotic I was taking.  They took me off of that today.  I had to beg and show them the warning on the lit. that came with the meds.  I feel some better right now but I have not made the bottom curve yet.  I can't wait to start feeling better.  I hope it's soon.  only two weeks until my next round of chemo and I want to get back to my fighting weight by then.  That was 15 lbs. ago. Emily and Ben, my dayghter and son in law, are coming this evening to help out and I look foward to their visit.  Hope everyone has a good weekend and God bless your house.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

March 3, 2011 Srinking Tumor,Laughing Hawk.

About 3:45 this morning I had a hard time and laying there I ,don't know if I was asleep or awake, ( At this time of the morning all you can do is lay there and pray to God to ease the pain and help you go back to sleep),  I had this dream or vision that I was in a flat endless desert and it was blazing hot.  I looked up and could see this hawk flying above leadeing me in a certain direction.  I called out that I needed more, like a hand to hold.  Suddenly I was in a place near a rock and the hawk was shilding me from the sun with his wings.It was an answer to much prayer.
I had my treatment this morning, then had a CT scan then spent a long time talking with my Doctor( McGary). He said that all of the pains I am having are normal for where I am in the treatment process.  Have to go to softer foods at room temp. and e gave me a sollution called Dr. McGary's Magic Mouth Wash, that he said would numb the pain if I let a tablespoon trickel down my throat 5 min. befor I eat. Havent tried it yet but I plan to tomorrow.  They are going to reduce the area of radiation and make it a stronger shot starting Monday after they get the Ct scan results.
I have to change my diet so I can get my sugar levels down.  I also need to loose weight.  That means I have to eat protein, lots of fat and cut back on carbs and sugar.  Couple that with the soft room temp. stuff and you have absolutely nothing to eat but snowballs, briers and twigs He also gave me new pain drugs that will probably make me goofy.  He said better goofy than hurting.  I'm not so sure of that.
That's al the news worth reading from this end.  May God bless you all.  Thank you Ron for taaking me today.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

March 2, 2011

Canceled my radiation today because the machine broke again.  This is twice in the last week the thing has gone down.  Makes me wonder if is working right when we use it.
Looked in the mirror this morning and after trying to figure out who I was looking at I decided It  is time to start me a new singing act.  I think I'll go country this time and call myself the rube headed stranger.  Look out Willie, here I come.
I'm going to take the rest of the day and rest. I thank the Lord for this day as it looks beautiful outside.  Seems like they look better all the time. 

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

March 1 2011

Today I awoke with a slight fever(99.8)  and have not felt good all day.  They put me on an anti biotic this evening as a precaution. My cough has gotten worse and it's making it hard to sleep.  Seems to get worse by the day. 
I went for radiation today and they said I am to have a CT scan tomorrow and then they are going to change the program a little bit.  Not sure what that means but I guess they are going to me more intense.  Radiation makes it hard to get food down and makes me tired.  Chemo is working overtime and my hair is mostly gone.
Carlie Bowen came to see me today and picked my day up quite  bit.  We ad some time to talk and reflect and it was like old times.  I was sorry that I could not play music todaybut the visit raised my spirits. Thanks Charlie for your visit.